Miscarriage can bring up a wide range of emotions:

Grief and Sadness

Mourning the loss of a pregnancy and the hopes attached to it can be profound and devastating. It may feel different to other grief, as unlike the loss of a loved one, there is nothing tangible to grieve. Instead, you are grieving for the loss of a future, expectations, the unrealised potential of who the baby could have been.

Guilt and Self-Blame

Often not knowing why you had a miscarriage can result in questioning your own responsibility, feeling like it’s your fault and wondering if you could have done something differently. You may also feel like your body has let you down or that something is wrong with you. This can affect how you see yourself, thinking you are not a worthwhile person unless you have a baby, particularly if you have had a previous miscarriage.

Isolation and Loneliness

You may have lots of people around you but if none of them seem to understand the depth of your experience, you can feel disconnected and alone. If you hadn’t told people you were pregnant, it can be difficult to bring up a conversation when people don’t know. And if you have experienced multiple miscarriages, you may be reluctant to talk about it for fear of boring people or making them feel awkward. Another issue may be feeling physically isolated as you may not want to go out to see family or friends, as well as not wanting to see pregnant women or children. This might mean that you miss out on getting the support you need, ending up feeling trapped in your own personal grief.

Anger and Frustration

Comments from well-meaning friends, family or even your partner can seem insensitive and make you feel angry and more upset. You may find it difficult to be happy for others who are pregnant or just had a baby, resulting in feelings of jealousy or anger, and then disliking yourself for having these feelings. Even social media posts about motherhood and pregnancy could make you feel angry about how unfair it is that it’s so easy for other women.

Anxiety and Fear

After your miscarriage, you may have difficulty managing everyday stressors. You may worry about conceiving again and whether you will ever have children. For some women, the physical process of going through a miscarriage can be so traumatic that it could lead to Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), resulting in having flashbacks or nightmares about what happened.